Why Hobba? @ Hobba (Vail Chowder House)

Out with the old and in with the new.  2011 was a massive year for the culinary industry with many exciting new openings throughout Melbourne.  For just one example, Asian inspired Melbourne powerhouse Chin Chin opened, where the secondary question to “how was the food” was always “how long was the wait?” (with the answer to both usually being “whatever, it was worth it”).  On the breakfast front 2011 saw countless new additions, see Coin Laundry in Armadale, Friends of Mine in Richmond and Pope Joan in East Brunswick – it seemed like the more new venues opened up, the longer the lines became. 

One of these new places was Hobba in Commercial Road, Malvern.  In typical new opening style, Hobba has been constructed in a generously sized stripped out tyre garage with minimal furnishings. I really liked the different seating areas comprising regular tables, larger share tables and my personal favorite, wooden booths.  I also thought the service here was outstanding and we dealt with multiple staff members and each were friendly, non-pretentious and helpful.  The coffee (5 Senses) was also exceptional.

On the downside, Hobba represents a trend in breakfast eating that I’m not particularly fond of.  Similar to a recent session at St. Edmunds in Prahran, Hobba has gone for the OTT-uber-gastro-gourmet menu e.g. "62.5c egg, asparagus, myrtleford butter poached salmon, goat’s cheese, pickled celery, apple, peas" which will set you back a lazy $21!  I know this is Malvern but this is only $10 less than a very decent main at one of Melbourne's top restaurants.

So my lovely companion ordered the bubble and squeak (fried egg, bubble and squeak, farmhouse slab bacon, roast tomato, brown butter hollandaise at $15.90) – she asked me what it was and I said it was basically something you would make yourself if you came home smashed after a massive night out and saw bacon, potatoes, eggs and onions in the fridge and threw it in the frying pan.  I expected it would look more glamorous here. And it was, I would describe it as precious (pictured left). 

Similarly the Hobba breakfast I ordered was equally precious (eggs, tomato, bacon, mushroom, cumberland sausage, sourdough grain & relish at $16.70 - see pictured below).  So precious it looked like the kitchen had measured each element of the dish so that it would not exceed the pre-ordained weight.  1 roma tomato 38 grams – check, 1 sausage 63 grams – check, tablespoon of relish - check, etc.  The bacon was undercooked, the bread relatively tasteless, the dollop of tomatoey relish scooped out of a Maggie Beer jar.  The upside was the eggs which were cooked at 65 degrees and come out somewhere between poached and soft boiled.

And this takes me to my point – before breakfast was cool it was a necessity.  You needed it to cure a hangover or you needed it because you were about to work a 12 hour shift on a building site.  I hate this trend of precious, delicate breakfasts that sound impressive on the menu but leave you asking “where’s the beef” (or bacon!). 

That leads me to wish a very solemn condolence to one place that knew what a real breakfast was – you would never leave this place hungry. Never.  For less coin than the Hobba breakfast, at Hepburn Springs’ Chowder House you could get freshly home baked sourdough bread (3 slices buttered), 2 poached eggs, shredded salty hash brown, lashings of crispy bacon, generous serving of spinach, multiple perfectly cooked mushrooms and 2 baked tomatoes.  This was a rustic big breakfast.  This would cure a hangover.  This is the sort of breakfast you would order before winning a war! 

Unfortunately after so many great breakfasts here, with exceptional hospitality and service, best non-city coffee, mornings doing the newspaper quiz with the rest of the diners, discussions about football and so many fond memories, Chowder House seems to have closed its doors.  So vail Chowder House and vail the big generous breakfast.  Might have to stick to the Bircher from here on in.